Tuesday, 3 October 2017


I used to make up stories about 'The Smelly Sock Family' and tell them to my two boys when they were growing up.  I never wrote them down at the time, only recently writing a couple of stories from what I could remember. I turned one of them into the poem below.  Hope you enjoy.


The Smelly Sock Family
Mum, and dad, Sue who was twelve, Janet eleven
Simon seven

Lived, where do you think?
The very bottom of the washing basket. 
Amongst the maximum of stink.

Now our noses may twitch and water.
For them nothing else could compare.
The smelly sock family were really very happy there

They had a lovely home
The smelliest of dirt, the greenest of grimy grime.
The Smelly Sock family always had the best of time.

Still Janet who was eleven
And Simon seven
Wondered, as you do, about the rumble and the roar above.

 ‘A monster lives up there. ‘Their father said.
That all Smelly Socks dread.
‘A washing machine.’ And left the rest unsaid.

Both Janet who was eleven
And Simon seven
Promised to never go in search of the monster that all Smelly Socks dread.

Next morning
Can you guess?
What they did instead.
Over piled up jeans and shirts they climbed
From the very bottom of the washing basket to the very top.
Not daring to look down both wanting secretly to stop.

The top they reached and peered over to see what they could see.
They gulped and wished they’d stayed in their smelly beds.
The Washing Machine Monster was everything their father had said.

What was that horrible yucky smell that made them cough?
Air freshener?  Fresh air?
They could smell it everywhere.

‘It’s horrible.’ Said Janet.
Said Simon. ‘I want to go home.’
‘Don’t’ Shouted another Smelly Sock called Jerome.

A human being fed the monster
Jeans, and shirts, and Jerome.
Jerome pleaded. ‘I want to go home.

‘We’ve got to help him’ Simon said
And tumbled onto the floor right onto his head. 
His sister had no choice but to follow.

They had almost freed Jerome
When up they were scooped with a whoosh and a shout
Into the Monsters mouth with no way out.

Trapped, ‘HELP.’ All three did shout. 
 About to be made clean and fresh
They had to get out.

They stared out the monster’s mouth
Jenny and Simon frightened and sad.
Then they spotted their big sister and were never so glad.

Jenny and Simon shouted. ‘Sue.’
She saw them and knew exactly what to do
To get them out before the Monster woke up.

Sue climbed and climbed
Her smelly sock yucky green grime
A slimy glue that stuck till she looked right into the monster’s mouth.

Nudging the latch that held the Monster mouth shut
With her smelly sock heel
Janet, Simon, Jerome escaped, never happier did they did feel.

They all crawled and rolled as quickly as they could
Hiding behind table legs when they should
Whenever the human being came near.

One time the human scooped Simon up
But he wriggled free, dropped, bumped his head, again, on the floor
Next day he knew it was going to be Smelly Sock sore.

The others grabbed him and scampering up the basket they went
Then rolling all the way down
Bouncing of jeans and shirts and an old dressing gown.

When they landed they had bruises aplenty
But safe. And more important still smelly.
That night they celebrated with a tee shirt bowl of smelly jelly.

Simon and Jenny’s mum and dad were not pleased
But not too angry after they heard how they had rescued Jerome.
Simon said.  ‘It’s good to be home.’

Janet and Simon and Jerome became the best of friends.
Will they ever climb again to the top of the Smelly Washing basket?
Well that all depends.

They made a promise did Janet who was eleven
Simon seven.
But what do you think?

Maybe their eyes glancing upwards to the very top of the smelly washing basket
Is a clue
What they might do.


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